On a Plain

Snakes on a Plane, that is.

The hoopla around this soon-to-be-crappy film, worth it for the ridiculous title and for the possibility of Samuel L. Jackson saying, "Mmm mmm bitch, there're a bunch of snakes on this muthafuckin' plane," got Holly to thinking about so-bad-their-awesome films she's seen. (By the way, this would make for good small talk when you're out runnin' the basepaths for Irony & White, Paper Cat -- hint hint.)

--Black Dog (1998): This film stars Patrick Swayze, Meatloaf and Randy Travis. 'Nuff Said.

--Anaconda (1997): Ice Cube opens the film by quoting a line from one of his songs ("Damn it was a good day") and ends it telling the worst CGI snake ever (blog theme tie-in!), "That's right bitch."

--Superman III (1983): Richard Pryor and Superman team up to defeat Superman. What?

--Bones (2001): This Snoop Dogg/Pam Grier vehicle, supposedly a horror film, has a startling central thesis; we loved our neighborhood better before crack infiltrated it and we engaged in the wholesome art of pimping.

--Passenger 57 (1992): Yay, another blog theme tie-in. Except this one stars Wesley Snipes, who can't act his way out of a wet paperbag. Involves a genius terrorist who is British. Come on now. That's not realistic (insert appropriate ironic emoticon here).

Get out your PBR's, invent drinking games, and get sloppy drunk watching shitty movies. What better way to waste brain cells ... other than watching American Idol ... or huffing gasoline.

PS: Pour out some of the PBR in honor of this beautiful soul.