Co-opted again

Corporate America has a way of sucking the life out of everything. Not even spinners are safe. They have been co-opted too--for diamond-studded gold teeth no less. If there were any justice in the world, people would realize that spinners were only meant for Sprewell shoes.

But corporate America has once again proved me to be the trend setter that I am. In this paid advertisement (please don't confuse it with journalism), you can get a flavor of how my carefully disheveled hipster look is going to be the next big thing among pre-teen middle-class girls. You see, socks no longer need to match. Does this mean the White Sox and Red Sox will join forces against the Yankees? Does anyone care what happens to the White Sox? I'm not sure. Maybe a celebrity can explain it to me. Celebrities know everything. I learned everything I know about semiconductor physics from Britney Spears.

Next thing you know, people will be wearing their belts backwards. Yes, I said it.