Nuthin' but a "G"(oth) Thang

We here at PEHOCAC don't pay nearly enough attention to the greatest sub-set of hipster culture: the goths. Their Christ-like mission to take on all our suffering should be highly commended. They got a bad rap after the Columbine High massacre seven years ago, which was totally underserved. Also, many of their living heroes--Robert Smith, Peter Murphy and Siouxsie Sioux, just to name a few--have not aged well. Petey Boy can't do that deltoid stretch like he used to, and Bobby, you're not fooling anybody with that "Robert Smith wig."



But not to worry. The goths are well-represented today. Even if Nine Inch Nails and Marilyn Manson are way past their prime, we have the slight mainstreaming of goth to behold in the films of the Wachowski Brothers and the "burlesque" shows of the Suicide Girls, who prove that the only difference between goth exhibitionists and their airbrushed Playboy counterparts is that they prefer tattoos and piercings to "guys who bungee jump."

Despite my snide commentary in that last sentence, so what if goth kids are "into their appearance" and kind of shallow. Who isn't? The next time you're with your hipster friends and make some sorta hilarious reference to the superhuman strength of Chuck Norris, who in your heart of hearts you know isn't worth the humor you create at his expense (seriously folks, the Chuck Norris thing is so three-months ago), tell me you're not. If it wasn't for goth kids, I wouldn't be here today, blogging my way to mediocrity (though I see nothing but bright lights ahead in the field of instant replay officiating for P. Kitty). By embracing the things that scare most people--death, pain, darkness, the Damned's music after 1980--and with a theatricality that calls attention our very human need to express ourselves in the way we dress ourselves (oh yeah, rhyme pays, baby), I salute the Gothic Kids (and, in some instances, Parents) of the World.

Now I'll turn out the lights, light one solitary white candle, and listen to "The Eternal" by Joy Division. "Procession moves on / the shouting is over ... "

[now playing on the PEHOCAC groovebox: Maria Kleigel/J.S. Bach, "Suite No. 1 in G major, BMV 1007: Gigue" (2005)]