Who Are You?

Another resource for maximizing options leading to requited amorousness (oooh, I know that it's not hip to be unjaded ...) is craigslist: a Internet kaffeeklatsch where one can find a sufficiently skuzzy roommate, a beat-up ol' stick shift missing three of its five gears, vintage late-90s Epiphone guitars, Radiohead bootlegs and, lastly but not leastly, luv. How brilliant is that?

That got me thinking--yessssss, this Celine Dion head of mine can actively process thoughts & make it through most of the day without pounding my chest when I emote or scaring school-children--Who is this "craig"? craig has his (I'm assuming craig's a he, just as y'all UNDOUBTEDLY assume Holly Go-Heavily is a she [insert relevant emoticon here]) own list. How did he get his own list? What special powers does he have that makes him feel it is his societal duty to maintain his own list?

Maybe craig, like the mythical beasts of heavy metal lyrics, breathes fire, and uses this power for evil, to smite his many enemies. Maybe craig is a robot sent from outer space to monitor the spurious ways in which thrifty capitalism and alternative, patchoulie-drenched sexualities intersect. As you probably know by now, my imagination can be a tad-bit hyperbolic. Maybe craig just had a well-funded access to web-space and had above-average computer programming skills, and thought about sharing his friends' junk with strangers. Whatever the case may be, this craig is an anonymous titan -- the elephant in the room / and that room is, roughly, someplace like Olympia, Washington (holla atcha boy ZeKeith McFisto!).

Then it occurred to me that there might be some information on the craigslist website. Here's what I found:

[this is a block quote!]

Craig Newmark observed people on the Net, on the WELL and in Usenet, helping one another out. In early '95, he decided to help out, in a very small way, telling people about cool events around San Francisco like the Anon Salon and Joe's Digital Diner. It spread through word of mouth, and became large enough to demand the use of a list server, majordomo, which required a name.

Also:

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Craig wanted to call it "sf-events", but more knowledgeable friends suggested calling it "craigslist" to reinforce its personal and down-to-earth nature. He still finds it awkward that such a visible site is named after him, but he'll get over it.

The author of this propaganda, some "craigophile," insists that craig eats humble pie with an almost laxative regularity, and that he's "down-to-earth." Yeah, a robot sent "down to earth." Oh well, I know he's just doin' it for the kids, and it really is a useful resource. I sold my shitty 1989 Chevrolet Cavalier there. Maybe I'm just jealous because my "hollyst" never took off. Sorry for being so grumpy, Cat ... it must be from all that tasty meat I've been eating while waiting for some online love-action.