Paris When it Sizzles

RIP Paris Hilton [1981-2005]

Nobody knows quite how she died. Some leading physicians suspect she was "forgotten to death." Dr. Peregrenious Fang of the Wimbledon Clinic for Podiatric Sciences speaks of other manifestations of this condition: "It's very similar to the overuse of the word shit. Because so many people say it so often now, it is no longer a profanity, no longer has shock value. It's like saying tourist or balloon. Well, some scientists believe the same thing happened to Paris Hilton. Vooooosh. She became passe. What can we say? I guess there are some things a $billion trust f-to-tha-muthafukin-izzund can't buy." The Dr. added, "By the way, has anybody seen the movie Paris When it Sizzles (1964), which reunited William Holden and Audrey Hepburn? It's an underrated film about a drunk screenwriter who, after months of lollygagging, has to produce some pages for his producer. Along the way, he gets bizzay with his assistant. It's much better than 1 Night in Paris (2004), though there's significantly less coitus."